Search This Blog

Monday, November 22, 2010

Love Someone Enough To Use The “F” Word

I am in a room filled with beautiful brilliant light from the morning sun that radiates rays of joy through the window pane. A sweet feeling sweeps over me as I stand in the warmth. Walking over to the window, I reach up for the little plastic ring connected to the bottom of the roman shade and with great ease of motion, pull the shade down, knocking out those white hot rays of gleaming bright light. Unforgiveness pulls the shade down on the window of my heart. When I am hurt, my automatic reaction is to believe I have to live in the shame of the wound and allow unforgiveness to hurl ugly taunts in my face. In that moment of pain I can choose to open my heart to ingest the putrid pieces of this lie and allow it to fester inside my heart, or reject it and forgive. I am a Christian, but have at times become disillusioned with the term, especially as I see the way I respond to those around me in light of what is written about me, as a Christian, in the Bible.

Jesus could have been saving Himself at the same moment He saved the whole world. He chose to wrap Himself onto a rugged cross with His own blood staining the wood after hours of cruel torture. He didn’t hold that horrendous injustice against a crowd of self-proclaimed judges. No doubt, I am numbered among those self-righteous judges. But He chose to let me off the hook today, and forgive my many actions when He said, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.” I think we do know the kind of action we take against this perfect man, but have no idea the consequences of unleashing what is inside our hearts. Some of the manuscripts from Christian scribes or ‘other ancient authorities’ lack this sentence. How could this be?

Return Wednesday for Part II


  1. I wrestle with this very thing often. I'm trying to make my ears and heart hear what God has to say to me instead of hearing the loud noises of distraction both outside and inside my head. I await the next chapter.

  2. Andria, this is so good! True and raw, this is what so many people struggle with but don't believe God allows it. Indeed, God welcomes our struggle for this is how He is able to work in us, through us, and among us! Thank you for sharing!